1301
BREAKING: The Pound twitter.com/BloombergUK/st…
1302
Looking forward to the section in the Sue Gray report explaining that the presence of a lightsaber means a party is actually a Jedi work event…
1303
Don’t worry @SamCoatesSky, the viewers love cats.
1304
Brendan and his ilk don’t seem to have realised that this Conservative government is currently a disaster for the people of the UK. The fact that his solution is already a proven failure rather gives the game away. When they let you vote, make sure to use it to demand better
1305
Boris Johnson: “You must now wait until the police investigation is completed for the full report”
MPs: “Will you publish the full report?”
Boris Johnson: No
1306
That cat thinks the salutes are for her/him. It’s right. 🐈 twitter.com/NATOpress/stat…
1307
I’m not saying the Conservatives have definitely lost both by-elections, but Boris Johnson is currently eyeing up large fridges to hide in… #kitileaks
1308
A couple of weeks ago he was telling the entire country he’d still be Prime Minister in a decade. He’s deluded. twitter.com/montie/status/…
1309
Well done Lord Wolfson. That takes the running total of government ministers who respect the rule of law to… one. #Partygate twitter.com/DXWQC/status/1…
1310
And a partridge in a pear tree.
PS Ate it. twitter.com/KevinASchofiel…
1311
Who won tonight’s debate? Keir Starmer. #BBCOurNextPM
1312
I’d like to tell you a story. It’s about a farm. An old fashioned farm that sold expensive milk, cheese and eggs. The people who owned the farm didn’t like change.
1313
I’ve seen him at 0630; it’s not pretty twitter.com/PaulBrandITV/s…
1314
On the 12th day of Xmas my true love sent to me, 12 drummers drumming 11 pipers piping, 10 lords a-leaping, 💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃. 8 maids-a-milking, 🦢🦢🦢🦢🦢🦢🦢, 6 geese-a-laying, 5 GOLD RINGS, 🦜🦜🦜🦜, 🇫🇷🐓🐓🐓, 2 🐢🕊, and a partridge in a 🍐🌳. All rules were followed…
1315
Wishing a very happy Mother’s Day to all those in the parts of the world celebrating today (don’t worry UK followers, we’re not)
1316
Watching these two bicker, makes you wonder how the government they’ve been central to has been such an ineffective mess…#BBCOurNextPM
1317
@FLOTUS First Cat of the United States?!
1318
Boris Johnson is being briefed on the latest coronavirus figures by the experts that he’s been ignoring. His response rhymes with “clucking bell”
#kitileaks
1320
The new Jurassic Park film looks AWESOME twitter.com/Milkjelly5/sta…
1321
I regret to inform you that Nadine is currently in the cupboard where people hang up their coats. We’re not sure why. twitter.com/GeorgieProRadi…
1322
Turns out that the UK is on the UK government’s amber list... twitter.com/transportgovuk…
1323
I know you’ll know this anyway, but there was nothing stopping the UK from having crowns on pint glasses while in the EU. Could have had crown shaped pint glasses.
theguardian.com/politics/2021/…
1324
Boris Johnson finally meeting the standards required… of eleven year olds. Demand better. twitter.com/Steven_Swinfor…
1325
Boris Johnson and a red bus: something bad is bound to happen.
Chief Mouser to the Cabinet Office. 15 year old tabby. Living with my fifth Prime Minister. Unofficial. A subpar odyssey.