1351
When a Midwestern father ties something down to a vehicle it is mandatory for him to pull the straps and say “that’s not going anywhere”
1352
Ya’ll crazy if you never heard of “no cop no stop” twitter.com/midwestern_ope…
1354
Nobody:
Midwesterners: you bet, take care, have a good one
1356
Top 5 Midwest Zingers:
5. How the hell are you?
4. Drive safe, watch for deer they have a death wish around here
3. Living the dream!
2. Well, spose it’s that time *knee slap*
1. Really not so bad without the wind
1358
Nobody:
Midwest Grandparents: “need anything warshed?”
1359
*the very first split second midwesterners think winter might be over*
Mother Nature:
1360
New York: skyscrapers!
LA: California girls 🤪
South: everything is bigger here
Midwest: COWS
1361
The lawn “doesn’t stand a chance”starter pack
1362
Midwesterner: sorry for bothering you
Surgeon: you seriously shouldnt be awake for this
1364
When uncivilized people trying calling it bags instead of cornhole
1365
As a Midwesterner my preferred natural disaster is tornado followed closely by the 100 year flood that happens every 5 years
1366
Welcome to the Midwest where you can experience 4 seasons in a day
1367
Midwest dad quotes:
flips over a piece of meat on the grill: “oh yeah that’s money right there”
asked what time it is: “time for you to get a watch”
when standing in their way : “you make a better door than a window”
answers the phone: “YELLO” twitter.com/midwestern_ope…
1368
Midwest Gas Stations in a blizzard:
Pay inside or at the pump?
Car wash?
Do you want this receipt?
If I fell off tomorrow would you still love me?
If I wrote you a love letter would write back?
Are you made cause I’m asking you 21 questions?
1370
Darron on behalf of the Midwest welcome looks like you’re adjusting quickly twitter.com/DLeeMG8/status…
1371
Wrong:
“I like your boots”
“Thanks”
Right:
“I like your boots”
“Thanks I got them at a significant discount!”
1372
*sandwich with everything you asked not to be on it*
Waitress: how is everything?
Midwesterner: Great!
1373
POV: someone doesn’t put their unfinished plate upside down in the trash and now I’m questioning how polite they are
1374
“I like your shirt”
Midwest women: oh thanks I got it on sale from target and it’s like a million years old
1375
Key to any successful midwestern relationship:
1. “Ope, sorry!” When you’re wrong
2. “Ope, sorry!” When you’re right
3. Drive an extra 30 minutes for favorite fast food
4. Start car in the cold
5. Put windshield wipers up before snow
6. Know at least 5 crockpot dishes
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody