852
“It can’t snow in September”
Midwest: hold my corn
853
I need a license plate that says “OPE SRY” so I can be a good Midwesterner and apologize when I accidentally cut someone off
855
We talk a lot about “Midwest Nice” but don’t forget about it’s cousin “Midwest Passive Aggressive”
856
Shorts and hoodie weather time of the year. If you see a Midwesterner smiling and enjoying themselves, leave them be. This is a spiritual time for us.
857
Ranch goes with pizza. I said what I said
858
Stranger: Hey where you from?
Midwesterner: Name every big city close by and say “around that area” rather than explaining where I’m actually from
859
What do you do for fun in the Midwest?
Me: well I start by kicking the ice chunks off of my car
860
Now that free speech is allowed on here
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
861
Everyone loves kindness until it’s someone waving you through a four way stop when they clearly got there first
862
Therapist: how are you
Midwesterner: living the dream
Therapist: 🤦♂️
864
Midwest billboards
“Jesus saves”
“Adult Store XXX”
“Casino”
“Dollar General next right”
“CHEESE 🧀”
“Beer and Liquor 2mi.”
“Visit our Historic Downtown”
865
As a Midwesterner I pride myself in being able to step outside, smell the air, and know a polar vortex is coming
866
People always make fun of midwesterners for not taking cover during a tornado when it’s literally called “tornado watch”
869
Midwest phone be like
╭━━━━━╮
┃ ══ ┃
┃█████┃
┃ ┃
┃ ┃
┃ Buy ranch┃
┃ ┃
┃Ok ┃
┃█████┃
┃ ○ ┃
╰━━━━━╯
870
No experience has met the thrill level of when my mom came into my room to say “go back to sleep it’s a snow day”
871
*sees cattle grouped together close to the fence line*
Anyone - “Awww look at the cute cows assembling together”
Intellectual Midwesterner- “The herd have gathered... there must be a storm coming”
872
Living in the Midwest
me
📍
📏 (45min to 1hr
📏 drive)
📏
📍
civilization
873
Welcome to the Midwest dress accordingly
874
Midwestern FOMO is driving with the windows down because it's above 45 degrees in February & you didn't want to "waste" such a "beautiful day"
875
Midwest power dad sayings:
gets bill at restaurant: *looks at youngest child* "Hope you brought your wallet"
flips over meat on the grill “oh yeah that’s money right there”
asked what time it is “time for you to get a watch”
“are you air conditioning the whole neighborhood?”
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody