701
South Dakota is on an indefinite suspension from the Midwest twitter.com/ByMikeBaker/st…
702
It is illegal to drive by cows in the Midwest and not say “COWS!”
703
David Attenborough: One of the most dangerous places in the world, the midwesterners icy front steps
704
Midwest Mom sayings:
“Watch out for deer”
“Are you hungry”
“Tell your parents I say hello”
“Did you get this done”
“Make good choices”
“Call me when you get there so I know you made it”
708
*hears sirens*
*looks outside and sees sun*
“Oh yeah it’s just the first Wednesday of the month”
711
Midwest billboards
“Cheese store”
“Jesus saves”
“Casino”
“Culvers next right”
“Beer and tobacco”
“Historic main st”
“16 Cracker Barrels exit now”
712
Midwest billboards
“Jesus saves”
“Adult Store XXX”
“Casino”
“Dollar General next right”
“Cheese”
“Beer and tobacco”
“Visit our Historic Downtown”
715
"Alright, well.."
how you know when a Midwesterner is trying to end a conversation.
716
The 8 layers to a Midwestern goodbye:
- about to leave warning (stand up)
- a "we've gotta go" statement
- hugs
- walking to the doorway
- one more conversation in the doorway
- more hugs
- continue talking while everyone's piling in the doorway
- placing hand on doorknob
717
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
“It’s really not so bad out without the humidity”
718
Spring Driving in the Midwest
🌽🌽🌽| || 🕳️ |🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🚘 || |🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🦌 || 🚧|🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🚧 || 🚧 |🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| || 🚧|🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🚜|| 🚧 |🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🕳️|| 🦌|🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| || 🚧 |🌽🌽🌽
719
Tornadoes:
Everyone in the US: (huddled in the basement) “we’re all going to die!”
People in the Midwest: (standing on front lawn) “I can’t see it. Where’s it at? Let’s get on the roof for a better view.” t.co/p3rKkKX9rr
721
southerners: wow this snow is so pretty!
midwesterners: this isn’t even snow yet folks- just you wait. i was born in an igloo and I drove to school on a snowmobile. we eat ice every meal. i can’t wait to die in a snow bank. warmth? never heard of it.
722
Midwesterner: “let’s go for sushi”
The sushi:
723
Every midwesterners favorite weather is the wind dying down
724
Growing up in the Midwest is understanding that there is a 50/50 chance you are opening leftovers instead of butter
725
Hear me out
🌧⛈🌧🌧🌧⛈🌧🌧⛈🌧
light spring rain and thunder is soothing
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody