376
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
Don’t say it
“It’s really not so bad out without the humidity”
377
midwesterner power move: rolling down the window and punching the ice out
378
Midwest meditation is slipping on the ice and just laying there for a bit
379
Midwest logic: It’s 40° and I’m only walking from my car to the building so I don’t need a coat
380
i am a:
⚪️ man
⚪️ woman
🔘 midwesterner
seeking:
⚪️ men
⚪️ women
🔘 a thunderstorm and tornado for entertainment
381
Midwesterners felt this in their soul
382
Welcome to the Midwest:
Winter is at 5 am
Spring starts at 10 am
Road work is from 12am-11:59pm
Summer is at 2 pm
False Fall begins at 3pm
And actual fall starts around 4:30ish
Dress accordingly
383
Midwest Food Pyramid
Ranch
Cheesy potatoes Steak
Scotcheroos Sweet corn
Sloppy joes Tater Tot Casserole
384
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
NORMALIZE PUPPY CHOW FOR BREAKFAST
385
Why you Netflix and chillin’ when you could be cornhole and grillin’
388
today is 50 degrees and by thanksgiving we will have six inches of snow
Ope
389
“You can’t go from a tornado to 4 inches of snow in 24 hours”
Midwest: hold my corn
390
“Ranch is disgusting” 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
391
There’s cold and then there’s scream in your car and rub your hands together as fast as possible cold
393
How To Use Ope
You’re in the way: “Ope, sorry.”
Suddenly called upon: “Ope, okay.”
It makes sense now: “Ope, got it.”
Late for something: “Ope, let’s go.”
395
Greatest Soda
18. you
17. can’t
16. possible
15. rank
14. these
13. carbonated
12. beverages
11. because
10. they
9. all
8. taste
7. so
6. unique
5. and
4. have
3. different
2. flavors
1. *it’s called pop
396
The junk drawer is a spiritual place in every midwestern home
397
Midwesterners justifying summer heat “it wouldn’t be so bad if we had a little breeze”
398
Midwest culture is that fridge in your garage or basement that a relative was “gettin’ rid of” and is now used strictly for Busch Light
400
every midwesterner rn