1402
It’s actually not that cold without the wind
1403
Midwest culture is driving 45 minutes to your favorite restaurant on special occasions
1405
When a Midwesterner says “the other day” it could mean 3 days ago or 2003
1406
The tension between a Midwesterner holding the door open and the one running to make sure the person isn’t holding it too long
1408
Speak Midwestern 101
No yeah = yes
Yeah no = no
Yeah no for sure = definitely yes 100%
Yeah no yeah = unfortunately the answer is yes
No yeah no = oh no, you’ve got nothing to worry about
1411
Midwesterner slang for a 1/10 review:
“I didn't mind it”
“Not too bad at all”
“Did the trick”
“Yeah, pretty good”
“Better than expected”
“Fine overall”
“Decent”
“I’ve seen worse”
“It was alright”
“No real complaints”
“I ate most of it”
“Yep, okay”
1412
*Midwesterners validating weather*
-20 out: “it wouldn’t be that cold without the wind”
99 degrees: “i’m only sweating because of the humidity”
20 degrees: “honestly if ya stand in the sun it’s not that bad”
40 degrees: driving with the windows down bc it’s finally “nice out”
1413
Midwesterner 40 degree weather starter pack:
1414
“what’s your talent?”
midwesterners:
1415
Midwest Date Idea: drive around for a little bit and end up at the gas station
1416
Things in Midwestern homes that just make sense
1. Beer fridge
2. Junk drawer
3. Lawn chairs in the garage
4. Plastic bag full of plastic bags
5. Storage on top of the fridge
1418
“I’m not coming” Midwestern translation:
1420
Minnesota has released snowplow class names of 2023 and they’re electric twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
1422
How midwesterners politely tell their visitor that it's time to go home 101:
*take a deep breath* then you just say "welp" really forcefully and slap your knees with your hands, then stand up. Other midwesterners will recognize the signal and say "spose we should head out"
1423
midwesterners entering “second winter” after experiencing “fool’s spring”
1424
let me tell you about the Midwestern-goodbye
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody