1126
Stages of I Love You in the Midwest
3. Watch out for deer
2. I started your car for you
1. I’m bringing home Culver’s tonight
1129
The Midwestern urge to say text me when you get home safe
1130
Midwestern moms when they see kids wearing shorts in negative degree weather
1131
Midwest culture is planning refueling the car around the warmest days of the week
1132
You’re not really a Midwesterner if you haven’t apologized to an inanimate object in the form of “Ope, sorry”
1135
Midwest phrase that everyone needs to learn to get off the phone:
“Well I’ll let you go”
1136
“You can’t have 45° Monday and 0° on Wednesday”
Midwest: hold my corn
1137
Key to any successful midwestern relationship:
1. “Ope, sorry!” When you’re wrong
2. “Ope, sorry!” When you’re right
3. Drive an extra 30 minutes for favorite fast food
4. Start car in the cold
5. Put windshield wipers up before snow
6. Know at least 5 crockpot dishes
1138
“What’s your favorite smell?”
Midwesterners:
1140
Going from 50° to 50 in. is about as Midwest as it gets
1142
Living in the Midwest taught me that 1° with no wind is better than 30° with wind
1144
If you ask a Midwesterner “how are you” and they respond
1. “well, im here”
2. “oh it’s going”
3. “living the dream”
send help immediately. It’s a desperate cry for help that loosely translates to “i need you to push me off the roof.”
1145
40° in February: I think I’ll crack a window
1146
Things in Midwestern homes that just make sense
1. Beer fridge
2. Junk drawer
3. Lawn chairs in the garage
4. Plastic bag full of plastic bags
5. Storage on top of the fridge
1147
What if we kissed off the Midwest interstate
1148
This is what Super Bowl Sunday is really about
1150
Toxic traits midwest edition:
1. Waving people through 4 way stops
2. Apologizing after asking for help
3. Buying things just because they’re discounted
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody