1026
On the 12th day of Christmas the Midwest gave to me
12 random seasons
11 unfixed potholes
10 bottles of ranch
9 tornado sirens
8 runaway cattle
7 u betchas
6 games of corn hole
5 OPE SORRYS
4 big storms
3 Welp, alrights
2 one finger waves
and a 30 minute doorway goodbye
1027
*hears sirens*
*looks outside and sees sun*
“Oh yeah it’s just the first Wednesday of the month”
1028
Watch out for your ex this midwestern wind is blowing trash everywhere
1029
Midwest moms watching from the window while their children shovel snow
1030
There are currently tornado warnings and blizzard warnings in the Midwest
HOLD MY CORN
1031
When driving past a field of cows on a road trip it is entirely acceptable to notify the entire car of their presence
“COWS”
1032
“You can throw the extra food and drinks on the porch”
1033
Midwest Thanksgiving:
⊂_ヽ
＼＼ ope, excuse me
＼( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
> ⌒ヽ
/ へ＼
/ / ＼＼just gonna sneak
ﾚ ノ ヽ_つ
/ /
/ /|
( (ヽ
| |、＼right by ya
| 丿 ＼ ⌒)
| | ) /
ノ ) Lﾉ
(_) and grab some stuffing
1034
“Apologizing after asking for help is not a personality trait”
Ope it is in the Midwest
1035
today is 50 degrees and by thanksgiving we will have six inches of snow
Ope
1036
Midwest phone be like
╭━━━━━╮
┃ ══ ┃
┃█████┃
┃ ┃
┃ ┃
┃ Buy ranch┃
┃ ┃
┃Ok ┃
┃█████┃
┃ ○ ┃
╰━━━━━╯
1037
Can you help me with this if not no worries I’m sorry
1038
Midwest nice can be exhausting:
- how are you?
- how are your parents/kids?
- can I get you anything to eat/drink?
- can I do your chores?
- do you need me to smile, wave, slightly nod my head or hold the door open for you?
- can I mow your lawn?
- do you want my house?
1039
South Dakota is on an indefinite suspension from the Midwest twitter.com/ByMikeBaker/st…
1040
City people :
- no smiling
- no eye contact
- don’t acknowledge your presence
Small town Midwest :
- smile and wave
- hold the door open
- How are your kids by the way?
1041
👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿
👉🏿👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👉🏼👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻👈🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾 👉🏽👉🏼Ope srry👈🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👉🏼👆🏻👆🏻👆🏻👈🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👆🏿👆🏿👆🏿👆🏿👆🏿👆🏿👆🏿👆🏿👆🏿👈🏿
1042
“I think we landed” is the most midwestern response ever after a near death experience twitter.com/ABC7Chicago/st…
1043
Packing outfits for the Midwest:
- T-shirt
- shorts
- hoodie
- pants
- rain jacket
- tornado jacket
- winter coat
- sub zero snow suit
- sunscreen and bathing suit
1044
Coworker: “how are you”
midwesterners: “wouldn’t be bad without the wind”
1045
“We can’t have a blizzard in November”
Midwest: hold my corn
1046
Talent is midwesterners ability to drive miles to their destination with a completely frosted windshield
1047
it’s fall in the midwest and it’s
⚪️ raining
⚪️ snowing
🔘 both
because:
⚪️ midwest weather
⚪️ climate change
🔘 ᵗʰᵃᵗ’ˢ ˢʰᵒʷ ᵇⁱᶻᶻ ᵇᵃᵇʸ
1048
How to know if a Midwesterner loves you:
- “I’ll start your car for you”
- “watch out for deer”
- “I’m bringing you culvers”
1049
This is the Midwest twitter.com/ShaneHuss/stat…
1050
Midwestern moms would like to remind everyone that 7up is the cure as cold season comes upon us
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody