477
*Midwesterner trying to ask someone for a favor*
Hey could you help me with this thing? Absolutely no pressure. Totally ok if you can’t. If you’d rather run me over with a car that’s cool. Ope, I’m sorry. Are you mad at me?
478
Midwest dads:
gets bill at restaurant: "alright what’s the damage”
tightens strap on back of truck: “that’s not going anywhere”
flips over a piece of meat on the grill: “that’s money right there”
Kid is hungry: “hi hungry I’m dad”
answers the phone: “YELLO”
479
“Money doesn’t matter” - rich people
“Looks don’t matter” -attractive people
“It’s not the cold, it’s the wind that gets ya” - Midwesterners
480
Speak midwestern 101
Welp = an exclamation before it’s time to go
No Yeah = Yes
Yeah no = No
I’ll let you know = They will not let you know
It’s all good no worries = are you kidding me with that crap
Geez Louise = peak anger statement
481
When the main characters mention your hometown
482
“it’s cold”
Midwesterner (no coat): you’re cold? Wait until February. We’ll eat icicles for breakfast and clear snow off our cars with bare hands. Midwesterners just don’t get cold easily, we’re genetically immune from generations of suffering. Minnesotans still live in igloos.
483
You
Vs.
The guy she
tells you not to
worry about
488
Nobody:
Midwesterners: better mow the lawn before winter is here
489
“It can’t snow in October”
Midwest: hold my corn
490
As a Midwesterner, fall is the superior season. Shorts and hoodie weather, no humidity, leaves changing. It is a very spiritual time and we are thriving. living our best life if you will.
491
Welcome to the Midwest
Winter is at 8am
Spring is at 11am
Summer is at 2pm
Fall is at 4pm
492
Nobody:
Midwesterners: that driveway is must suck to drive up in the winter
495
Midwesterners when they hear you can save big money at Menards
497
Midwesterners refusing to wear a coat until December
500
Imagine a Cornhole game to the death twitter.com/dondadabossman…
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody