326
4-way stops are a nightmare in the midwest
327
I just took a DNA test
Turns out
Im 100%
Ranch dressing
328
I don’t care how cold it gets the fan stays on at night
329
If you hear a Midwesterner say “all good don’t worry about it” just know they are fighting for their life
330
Wrong
“I like your coat”
“Thank you!”
Right
“I like your coat”
“Thank you I got it at a significant discount!”
331
There’s cold and then there’s scream in your car and rub your hands together as fast as possible cold
332
Listing the top 3 midwesterner talents:
1. ability to smell a storm before it comes is our sixth sense
2. driving miles to your destination with a completely frosted windshield
3. apologizing uncontrollably to everything. it’s a curse and a blessing. we’re sorry. ope
333
Friday nights for kids in the Midwest:
“Meet at McDonald’s”
“I’m bored let’s go drive around”
“Party at the barn”
“Run to the corn”
and the late nights at Perkins
335
Yeah sex is good but have you ever had Culver’s cheese curds?
336
“Money doesn’t matter” - rich people
“Looks don’t matter” -attractive people
“It’s not the cold, it’s the wind that gets ya” - Midwesterners
337
“Hey siri how much snow will there be on Christmas”
The Midwest:
338
welcome to the Midwest:
- Winter is at 5am
- Spring starts at 8am
- Winter hits again at noon
- Summer is at 2pm
- Fall starts around 5:30ish
Dress accordingly
339
WHAT DO WE WANT????
|￣￣￣￣￣￣|
| Spring. |
|＿＿＿＿＿＿|
(\__/) ||
(•ㅅ•) ||
/ づ
WHEN DO WE WANT IT????
|￣￣￣￣￣￣|
| NOW |
|＿＿＿＿＿＿|
(\__/) ||
(•ㅅ•) ||
/ づ
*doesnt get it till June*
343
nobody: *tornado sirens*
midwesterners: “it’s tuesday my people"
344
⚠️THIS IS THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE TAKE SHELTER NOW⚠️
┳┻|
┻┳|
┻┳|
┳┻|
┳┻|
┻┳|
┳┻|
┻┳|
┳┻| _
┻┳| •.•) *midwesterners*
┳┻|⊂ﾉ
┻┳|
345
It’s not the heat that gets ya, it’s the humidity
347
A big part of being a midwesterner is pretending that a sunny 45 degrees 25 mph day is really nice out
348
Christmas in the Midwest
Expectation Reality
350
“tHe MiDwEsT DoEsN’T hAvE aNy CuLtUrE”
Oh yeah? Explain this
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody