228
Looking at someone’s driveway thinking “that’s gotta be tough to get up in the winter”
229
anybody: “how are you”
midwesterners: “wouldn’t be bad without the wind”
230
What contributed the most to surviving boredom in small town Midwest?
5% hanging out in the mall
5% “let’s go to McDonalds”
15% going to Walmart
75% driving around before doing
one of those three
65,377,684 votes • Final results
231
I don’t know if we should be impressed or disappointed
232
Midwesterners be like “rear defrost will take care of that”
233
Checklist for a Midwesterner vacation:
☑️ Wisconsin Dells
☑️ Mall of America
☑️ Kansas City airport
☑️ visiting the “Windy City”
☑️ 4 hour trip to any amusement park
234
*being held hostage by fellow midwesterners*
them: *holding a soda can in front of me* what is this called, bitch???!!!
me: it's a soda
them: *beating the shit out of me* you're from the midwest. it's called pop!
me: *spitting out blood* f*** you
236
Midwesterners when they’re bored twitter.com/McConaughey/st…
237
If you say “ope” in a mirror three times, a midwesterner will appear and ask you to play cornhole
238
Welcome to the Midwest:
- corn
- corn
- corn
- corn
- corn
- dollar general
- corn
- corn
239
As it gets colder midwesterners begin to point out driveways that will be “tough to get up in the winter”
240
It’s funny when midwesterners say “the other day” because it could mean yesterday or 1992
242
Midwesterners be like:
Ope
| 👀 |
\ /
____| |_____
/ ✊__/
\_✊
lemme
| 👀 |
\ /
____| |_____
/__✊ \
👋_/
sneak past ya
| 🕶 |
\ 👅 /
____| |_____
/ ✊__/
\_✊
& grab some Casey’s pizza 🍕
243
Can we get a nice day in March?
Midwest:
244
the most midwestern thing you’ll read all day
245
Welcome to the Midwest
Winter is at 8am
Spring is at 11am
Summer is at 2pm
Fall is at 4pm
246
Driving in the Midwest
🌽🌽🌽| || 🕳️ |🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🚘 || |🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🦌 || 🚧| “HELL IS REAL”
🌽🌽🌽| 🚧 || 🚧 | 🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| || 🚧|🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽| 🚜|| 🚧 | “Kwik Trip Next
🌽🌽🌽| 🕳️|| 🦌| Right”
🌽🌽🌽| 🐄|| 🚧 |🌽🌽🌽
247
Yeah she’s cute but will she land a bag on the board in crunch time at the family cornhole tournament? 👏🏻
248
“What’s it like playing sports in the Midwest?”
midwesterners: twitter.com/alexishumphr3y…
249
Living in the Midwest taught me that 1° with no wind is better than 30° with wind
250
midwesterners on the first wednesday of the month
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody