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An Midwestern Baptism twitter.com/DannyDutch/sta…
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Stranger: Hey where you from?
Midwesterner: Names all the cities that are geographically close to my town and say “around that area” rather than explaining where I’m actually from
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Find the Midwesterners who don’t apologize after bumping into you:
👩🏻👩🏼👩🏽👩🏾👩🏿👩🏻👩🏼👩🏽👩🏾👩🏿
👨🏻👨🏼👨🏽👨🏾👨🏿👨🏻👨🏼👨🏽👨🏾👨🏿
👧🏻👧🏼👧🏽👧🏾👧🏿👧🏻👧🏼👧🏽👧🏾👧🏿
👦🏻👦🏼👦🏽👦🏾👦🏿👦🏻👦🏼👦🏽👦🏾👦🏿
Can’t find them?
That’s because they live among us, looking like normal people. The only difference is they’re going to hell.
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for years I've thought that cinnamon rolls and chili were something that just went together; finding out it's just a midwestern thing & I'm baffled
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*describe living in the Midwest*
me: my life is just one big “ope”
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Say you’re from a small town to someone else also from a small town and it’ll turn into some weird competition like:
How many kids were in ur graduating class???
Um private schools don’t count!!..
Oh ya... BUT did you have bring your tractor to school day??!
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In the Midwest we don't stop at stop signs, we do what we call "a rolling stop" or slide through the stop in the winter.
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Two Midwesterners pass each other on the street:
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Midwest culture is saying “it feels so nice out” when the temperature is in the mid 30’s
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What is a midwesterner’s drug of
choice:
ope-ium
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Midwest culture is staying after the designated class time while the professor talks because everyone is too polite to get up and leave
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murderer: *stabs midwesterner*
midwesterner: ope, sorry. scuse me
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In the Midwest, the size of your town is based off of how many stop lights are in it
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Friday nights for kids in the Midwest:
“Meet at McDonald’s”
“I’m bored let’s go drive around”
“Party at the barn”
“Run to the corn”
and the late nights at Perkins
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*temp gets above 35° in winter*
midwesterners: guess I don’t need my coat today
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On the 12th day of Christmas the Midwest gave to me
12 unpredictable seasons
11 unfixed potholes
10 cups of ranch
9 tornado sirens
8 no cop no stops
7 “you betchas”
6 suicidal deer
5 OPE SORRYS
4 hotdish meals
3 Uffdas
2 games of cornhole
And a 1 finger wave from an oncoming car
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We talk about “Ope” as a midwestern phrase but we what really need to discuss is the “you’re fine” vs “no worries” response to sorry
retweet for “you’re fine”
favorite for “no worries”
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Ladies, if he
-has manners
-drinks Busch Light
-says “ope”
- wears shorts and a hoodie in the snow
-is polite and holds the door for you
He’s from small town Midwest. And you’ll probably drive around on your first date.
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*small town introduction*
Kid 1: “I’m from a small town”
Kid 2: “OH YA, HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE IN YOUR GRADUATING CLASS? I HAD 15.”
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every midwest father’s dream twitter.com/Alycia101Serna…
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📍people from the Midwest
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📍ranch dressing
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📍pizza
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody