26
Friday nights for kids in the Midwest:
“Meet at McDonald’s”
“I’m bored let’s go drive around”
“Bonfire party tonight”
*Walking around Walmart or the
mall for fun*
“Let’s go to Steak ‘n Shake”
28
“I think we landed” is the most midwestern response ever after a near death experience twitter.com/ABC7Chicago/st…
29
*Midwest dad at a restaurant who just paid his bill*
His Brain:
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Dad:
"You guys ready to rock and roll?"
30
8 levels of midwestern anger
8. “Woah woah woah”
7. “Hold your horses”
6. “Jeez Louise”
5. “Listen here pal”
4. “If I had a nickel for every time”
3. “Well, now wait a minute”
2. “For Pete’s sake”
1. “Son of a gun”
31
I am a midwesterner and I am
🔘Cold
🔘Not cold
☑️Wouldn’t be that bad without the wind
32
Dollar General when they see an open field in the smallest Midwest town
33
I am a midwesterner and I am
🔘Cold
🔘Not cold
☑️Wouldn’t be that bad without the wind
34
Shorts and hoodie weather this week. If you see a Midwesterner smiling and enjoying themselves, leave them be. This is a spiritual time for us.
36
Fav if you’re from the Midwest and insulted by this map twitter.com/Climatologist4…
38
Ope
| 👀 |
\ /
____| |_____
/ ✊__/
\_✊
hold on lemme just
| 👀 |
\ /
____| |_____
/__✊ \
👋_/
sneak by ya
| 🕶 |
\ 👅 /
____| |_____
/ ✊__/
\_✊
and grab some ranch
39
midwest nice is putting your paper plate upside down in the trash so you don’t offend whoever made the stuff you didn’t eat
40
In the Midwest “I’ll let you know” means we’re not coming
41
WHAT DO WE WANT????
|￣￣￣￣￣￣|
| Spring. |
| |
|＿＿＿＿＿＿|
(\__/) ||
(•ㅅ•) ||
/ づ
WHEN DO WE WANT IT????
|￣￣￣￣￣￣|
| NOW |
|＿＿＿＿＿＿|
(\__/) ||
(•ㅅ•) ||
/ づ
42
*Drops phone*
My brain-
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Me - “ope”
44
Midwestern folk units of measurement:
Next door= 1-2 miles
Right up the road= 5-10 miles
Up North= 15-100 miles
A couple miles= 10-20 miles
Not too far= 20-50 minutes
A little ways= over an hour
A pretty good drive= 2 hours +
Drive down there= literally any direction
45
Stop talking trash about different Midwest states:
Minnesota is ICONIC
Wisconsin is INSPIRING
Ohio is MAGNIFICENT
Michigan is STELLAR
Illinois
Iowa is CUTTING EDGE
47
ppl from the Midwest be “why would I fly when it’s only a 15 hr drive”
48
Midwestern families on vacation:
*goes to take picture*
“Ope”
*removes lens cap*
“That would probably help huh”
50
*midwesteener hits a curb*
“Ope”
*hits 2 curbs*
“Ope. Ope.”
*hits a pothole*
“I’m so sorry car”
Representing and defending THE #1 region || insta: midwestvseverybody