551
i remember favoriting tweets abt this like “haha MOOD!” i take it back. i want someone in my house. please twitter.com/TheCut/status/…
552
i just saw a video on here of a lesbian couple proposing to each at the same time, unplanned. the gays have now won marriage. heterosexuality is illegal in all 50 states
553
me and this uber driver were exchanging uber stories and
554
yall will notice the coffee cup on game of thrones but yall won’t notice your cup runneth over from the bounties and blessing of Jesus Christ our lord
555
i don’t exercise to be hot i exercise to be stronger so i can talk more shit
556
sitting at 7. raising a family at 7. retiring at 7. dying a peaceful death at 7. twitter.com/HexPositive/st…
557
“ya man dm he be beggin for my pelvis
shittin on bitches til i’m dead — elvis” twitter.com/nmcharts/statu…
558
death in the backyard while everyone is making their take home plates
559
the racism dial has been dialed back to get out ❤️
561
excited to be vaporized for jaywalking by ironman twitter.com/ShaneGoldmache…
563
remember when you could use electronics out of the box without installing an app and getting on wifi and setting up a monthly membership then climbing a mountain with your son and holding a knife to his throat until the voice that was giving you directions tells you to stop
564
i was filling out a retail job application @ a chicago mall. this 70yo yt man wearing backpacking gear comes up to me & says “i’m gonna go tell the manager you found my wallet in the bathroom and i tried to give you a cash reward but you turned it down.” he did & i got the job twitter.com/adribbleofink/…
566
no one:
lady macbeth:
twitter.com/ARIE77E/status…
567
tom cotton gotta b the most racist name ive ever heard LMAO y the fuck would u listen to this discreTe confederaTe twink looking ass, “i dont wanna grow up, i’m a toys’r’us kid” geoffrey the giraffe long neck ass, guhyuck GARSH face ass, Kirkland Signature jared kushner ass bitch twitter.com/thunderwooddd/…
569
thank god he was in his car seat twitter.com/2Cool2BIog/sta…
570
hitting children is wrong it’s adults that need to be whooped actually
571
i want to do this but im so deeply afraid they are going to accidentally kill me. not because im afraid to die but because this is such an embarrassing way to die twitter.com/chiropractorrs…
572
nate already sending the dont come to school tomorrow texts
573
are you in the right headspace to give me one good movie kiss
574
u.s. banks after 2008 twitter.com/judysquirrels/…
575
he's never heard a black person on the phone with customer service twitter.com/JasonSCampbell…
