326
i don’t understand the stock market but i’m never going to ask about it because i do not want to hear it be mansplained to me
327
i love when i get added to girls’ close friends stories when i’ve never even met them .... like no i do not know u, yes i would lay down my life for u, please tell me more about the new girl ur ex is with i’m listening??
328
happy annual “donna sheridan had sex” day
329
i have one hobby and it is being beautiful and i am very good at it. i am also incredibly humble
331
i be like “im good” and the narrator doing the voiceover for my life is like “she was not, in fact, good”
332
john green is the lin manuel miranda of fiction
333
my self confidence is directly correlated to how much blush i am wearing
334
“i love your energy” thank you it only exists because i consumed three times my weight in caffeine
335
i never even asked to exist and now i have to spend my limited time in this life performing tedious labor to make money so i can survive
336
still dont know my name from the euphoria soundtrack deserves a grammy an oscar an emmy a golden globe a nobel peace prize
337
you’re in his dms im visiting him in his dreams
338
if we all reveal our credit card numbers we can rule them out one by one and eventually figure out jeff bezos’ credit card number and spend his money. ok u guys start
339
oh to be 13 years old again buying flower crowns from urban outfitters and projecting my entire sense of self onto an angsty john green character
340
mischief = life sentence
but rape = 3 months in jail
...... somethin aint right here twitter.com/thehill/status…
341
all the best scenes in the twilight saga happened in that big ass field
342
men be like “girls are just exaggerating their period pains” but will literally cry if you tweeze their eyebrows
343
yeah ur girl is bad but is she renesmee’s cgi in breaking dawn part 2 bad
344
“you’re so funny” thank you i was ugly in middle school
345
does any man want to venmo me $400 for the lirika matoshi strawberry dress
346
kid cudi dancing to electric feel to cleanse the tl
347
do you guys remember when robert pattinson went on the today show and told an entire story completely unprovoked about witnessing a clown gruesomely die and it was all made up because i sure do
348
u know what fuck dwayne the rock johnson for forever taking away our ability to wear a black turtleneck with high waisted blue jeans and some necklaces out in public
349
everyone who got bullied for their interests at age 12 has an elite personality and sense of humor now yes i’m looking at you twilight and one direction fans
local girl writing tweets and also articles