1026
damn a domestic terrorist kills two people and suddenly white people want prison reform
1027
uber drivers be like “can u give me directions.” none of us know what we’re doing. this world is pure chaos
1028
dating is so hard for me because i just like eating pizza and watching netflix and petting hecka puppers. it seems like people have lost sight of what’s most important (besides coffee), which is just nerding our with your best friend and going on wine fueled adventures together
1029
i’m saving my virginity for the next rihanna album
1030
anyone not on theme this year at the met gala is homophobic
1031
me on limewire infecting the family computer
1032
me seeing a rude white person: you know his ass was at the capitol
1033
i don’t want americans to have a livable wage, i want lil caesars employees to say pizza pizza again twitter.com/JRubinBlogger/…
1034
just took a benadryl
twitter.com/pissingsemen/s…
1035
watch me almost say nigga at :27 twitter.com/glaad/status/1…
1036
poc: *breaks plate in an ihop*
news: Terrorist Starves Table of Six
white person: *sinks california into the pacific*
news: Dave Has Bad Day
1037
mind your fucking business like the adult you refuse to be
1038
remember that even on your worst days you'll never be uglier than capitalism
1039
a subtweet: sorry not sorry but some people in my 6th period biology class are so fake
me, twenty two years of age: is this about me
1040
another good ol american song about taking a full leg up your ass twitter.com/nbc4i/status/9…
1041
the new pick me’s are straight dudes tweeting “i wouldn’t even kill lil nas x for being gay... ladies”
1042
you have to shoot holes in their lungs so the air can get in twitter.com/BisHilarious/s…
1043
fellas is it gay to listen to sufjan stevens and softly weep, yearning for a mans touch 🤔
1044
aliens at area 51 making a twitter to ask for fka twigs back
1045
yet you were perfectly fine nosediving into my WAB like an olympic hopeful last november??? delete this twitter.com/JamesBradleyCA…
1046
me:
louis ck: back in my day the only pronouns were nigga/er
1047
oh we dragging marian catholic? the school that has a majority black student body but like 2 black staff members? the school that expelled black students for false positives on drug tests? the school that had teachers refuse to play the obama inauguration? the school that used un
1048
i’m a man of simple pleasures. i just want to feel good all the time and never be hurt, physically or emotionally. that’s all i humbly ask 😌
1049
thank every last one of you who tweeted... i wouldn’t have been freed without you. they can try to hide the truth but the fact remains: twitter.com/jaboukie/statu…
1050
*walks up to straight couple* so who’s the autobot and who’s the decepticon
