826
whenever i tweet short king positivity i lose followers... but somewhere out there... a short king gains a crown
827
lightskins getting ready to complain about people calling us pretty
828
yes i’m black. yes i use day mode. we exist.
829
no offense but vegan ice cream goes harder than da*ry ice cream
830
if heaven is real it is ON SIGHT with adam & eve. i could’ve been posted up with nectarine juice running down my chin, cheeks out, sunkissedt & unbotheredt but bitches had to eat that mf apple (objectively worst fruit) and now the world is melting and i have 50k in student debt
831
the straight girl in my friend group trying to get us into heaven
832
twitter started giving notifications for protected accounts quote tweeting and i just saw someone privately talking shit for the first time
833
both were private. they don’t show up in the notifications tab but they show up as banners
834
ur death drive & sex drive arguing about how hard u wanna get choked
835
therapy
- expensive
- months to years of hard work
- emotionally draining
“it be like that sometimes”
- free
- immediately super effective
- emotionally healing
836
me accidentally rebiting the side of my mouth that’s swollen from biting it earlier
837
i one day i will be 50 years old putting on a yale sweatshirt and pouring alcoholic horchata into flask omw to see a vampire weekend reunion tour and only then will i understand how all those white parents felt going to see bon springstreen or whoever
839
a list of some affordable therapists
docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d…
841
this is the 11 year anniversary of when i was scammed out of 500k neopoints and the last time i trusted another person
843
snooki getting punched in the face on jersey shore was the modern stabbing of julius cesar and the beginning of the fall of the american empire
844
plain white t’s: hey there delilah what’s it like in new york city
delilah: air is $5 a pound and my neighbor called the police on a baby for being black near a coffee shop
845
nazi: He Protecc The White Race... & He Attacc The Minorities
twitter: great meme Jeff :)
847
the reba theme song is white people’s itty bitty piggy
848
me: pete wentz is black
also me: tea
also also me: you’re perpetuating the one drop rule by considering someone as white passing as pete wentz black
also also also me: tea
also also also also me: either way pete wentz can say nigga
also also also also also me: tea
850
just asked my uber driver if he could stop at starbucks because i have diarrhea and i’m so proud of how good i’ve gotten at communicating my needs
