26
i know the back of batman's ankles be cut up running around gotham in those doc martens
27
STOP posting game of thrones spoilers i’m still on episode 0 with no intention to watch
28
children keep dying of the flu in ICE detention centers but y’all praying for trump
29
most of white america has no culture outside of consumerism so burning down a chili’s is like destroying a family heirloom
32
this nigga illegally endorsing beans twitter.com/KondorMillz/st…
33
i’ve moved past quarantine horny i don’t want sex i want to fist fight
34
y’all are like “going to my grand parents for thanksgiving 🤗” baby that’s the last supper
35
liberal arts major:
stem major: ugh im so JEALOUS of u like i WISH i could just read clifford the big red dog and make flower crowns but instead i gotta create the new ai algorithm for the robot amazon uses to beat workers when they faint lol but good luck finding a job lol jk ;)
38
white people pulling up to protests with swords and bows and getting mad when people beat their ass like?? okay frodo
39
nature docs in 2002: happy dolphins swim playfully, delighted after a good meal
nature docs in 2019: this penguin thinks a garbage bag full of guns is its child
40
responded to a work message while i was playing with my dog and the voice text kept going
41
white people calling the police on their shadows
42
fros are back. everyone's obsessed with flowers. popular music is psychedelic/funk influenced. nuclear war is imminent. it's the 70s
43
if you have an lgbtq phobic family member tht merely tolerates you. take them aside and explain how you have seen the light and are trying to be cishet. there are classes but they’re expensive–you want it to be a surprise to the rest of the family-so you need $8500 to be straight
44
$15 minimum wage? how am I supposed to feel better about my position in the social hierarchy if there aren’t millions of people unnecessarily suffering beneath me? some of you don’t know economics
45
how's fiona supposed to eclipse the sun when she's a star twitter.com/cincinnatizoo/…
46
the way you named your child after an iphone strong password twitter.com/elonmusk/statu…
47
the vice principal at 6:30pm asking if there’s anyone else i could call to pick me up
48
now y’all know damn well if china did this... twitter.com/HomaBashWEWS/s…
49
youth culture is feeling like if you don't succeed by 25 someone will literally come kill you
50
i told him that when i found out he wrote for 30 rock i realized black people could write tv and now i’m a screenwriter and he said he recognized me from twitter i’m astral projecting
