1076
People named Gene are also invited to attend, but their jeans do not have to blue.
1077
I was at the store and couldn't figure out the card chip reader and the old lady behind me chuckled and said "I can relate" and all I heard was LOL RELATABLE ME AF 😂 and I couldn't hate my generation more than that moment
1078
I donated to the Louisville Community Bail Fund and encourage you to do the same if you can. It works to help arrested protesters who are standing up against the murder of Breonna Taylor. #BlackLivesMatter
actionnetwork.org/fundraising/lo…
1079
FIRST FORM:
Home Asian Auntie 👵
#Halloween19
1080
What's happening in Texas is dangerous. Everyone deserves safe and accessible reproductive health care. The new abortion law strips away those basic rights.
Here's a link to a fundraiser that splits donations across abortion funds and providers in Texas:
secure.actblue.com/donate/txfunds twitter.com/TexasTribune/s…
1082
After you inform your bosses and teachers, they will scratch their heads and check their calendars. That is when you run away as fast as you can while setting off fireworks.
1083
Your incredible, superior taste shows when you nerd out over #DarkCrystal and Jim Henson
1084
MOM: "You look too skinny what are you eating."
ME: "I ate a whole pizza last night."
MOM: "Don't do that you'll get fat."
#Moms
1085
My stance on payment method reinforces my Americanness: I prefer the feeling of the swipe. I know it's less secure, but it's far more satisfying as a physical motion. It's sexy. It's aggressive. It's luxurious. Tapping is cold. Inserting is boring. Swiping will be sorely missed.
1086
You know how in apocalypse movies where a part of the population starts freaking out because they’re infected by something unfamiliar and start rampaging? I felt like I was in one when I woke up to people losing their minds over the Instagram update. I’ve already locked my doors.
1087
I think about this Calvin and Hobbes strip often.
"I suppose it will all make sense when we grow up."
It doesn't.
1088
Moral of the story: count your blessings. We have so much we take for granted. Get out there and do some good.
Second moral of the story: if you skip heating it up, the pizza gets to your mouth faster.
1089
Still in disbelief that the incomparable @MariahCarey agreed to help me surprise two of her biggest lambs! Gracious, funny, and always stunning. 🦋 #lambily #merrychristmas 🎄 (full video on my IG)
1090
Waited until the last moment to say Happy #NationalSiblingsDay because the point of having brothers and sisters is to reluctantly love them in the most passive-aggressive way possible.
1091
This is the Internet. When you comment you know damn well that we can all see your picture and profile.
It's a new, terrifying evil that openly flaunts their heinous behavior. Many are children who lack the comprehension that they're being awful. It needs to be called out more.
1094
Childhood Me wanted to become Teenage Me
Teenage Me wanted to become 20s Me
20s Me wanted to stay 20s Me
30s Me laughs at how silly I was while continuing to inhale cheese
1095
The one bright spot of attending so many holiday parties is inevitably finding the handful of random strangers who are also obsessed with #TheGoodPlace and spending the rest of the night screaming drunkenly at other partygoers to go forking watch it already.
1096
*eugene enjoys the company of a child for 34 minutes and 21 seconds*
youtube.com/watch?v=DHFGf-…
1097
if this image of a cul-de-sac makes your skin crawl, you probably grew up in one
1098
I'm BASKING in the glory of Asian-American excellence at the Winter Olympics!
My skin is clear.
Our future is bright.✨
@chloekimsnow @nathanwchen @mirai_nagasu @AlexShibutani @MaiaShibutani @yung_hails @Karebearsk8 @chockolate02 @govincentzhou @jrcelski @jLanTan @AaronVaughnTran
1099
I sat down for an exclusive interview with @YouTube CEO @SusanWojcicki to discuss the new harassment policy, COPPA and the FTC, LGBTQ issues, politics and extremism on the platform, demonetization, the algorithm, and the future of YouTube as we enter 2020.
youtu.be/fKIsuulxJ1I
1100
Our parents' sacrifices to build a better life for their kids makes us stronger
Seoul 1976 / LA 2016
#IAmAnImmigrant
