1377
"1 if by land, and 2 if by sea and i on the opposite shore will be ready to SHUFFLE THROUGH A FIRE PIT" #paulrevere
1378
snuck into a famous haunted house last night and now i think i'm being followed by a ghost raccoon
1379
just realized my wrist smells like salmon and this raccoon is not a ghost and why does my wrist smell like salmon?
1380
does anyone know if the black dahlia loved to eat salmon club sandwiches?
1382
being outside was the original iphone
1384
my sunday style can be described as "the Fresh Prince of Persia"
1385
sometimes i dress like an undercover cop trying to blend in with dangerous 8th graders. "Yo to your... instagram.com/p/7BZ-ohjWah/
1386
meet Kool Jordan, the undercover 8th grade cop that is great at blending in. #kooljordan
1387
STOLEN CALCULATOR? have a chillax pill! Kool Jordan the undercover cop who totally blends in with 8th graders is...instagram.com/p/7EMO6GjWUv/
1388
1389
looking for the Loch Ness monster and some longer shorts
1390
1391
secret to being a great undercover cop like Kool Jordan? Always introduce yourself using most current street lingo
1392
hey guys remember that time i wouldn't stop posting Kool Jordan videos?
1393
#throwbackthursday to when i lived on Alderaan
1394
heyoooo it's saturday night, i'm in comfortable pants and about to eat 2 bags of sour skittles
1395
by 2 i mean 3, and by skittles i mean pints of ice cream. call an adult, i have finally "transitioned" into Macaulay Culkin from Home Alone
1397
...that would be my band name if i had a band.
1398
...we would only play Christmas Songs, Chanukah raps, and the theme song from "Friends."
1399
harper the "hot dog" cow and harper the hot "dog cow"
1400
if i had a nickel for every time a drone caught me giving shemar a massage...
really good at decorating for holidays