326
Due to personal reasons, I will be going to Hell.
327
Ellen: today we have a very special surprise
Me: omg 👀
Ellen: remember how you said you were home sick?
Me: Ellen you didn’t 😢
(The ground parts, lava engulfs the stage. There’s muffled screams in the distance)
Me: ELLEN!! 😭❤️
328
I heard Jesus was talking shit about me in heaven, well guess what bitch atleast i don’t have to live with my dad for all eternity.
329
Wake up sinners, it’s a beautiful day to do nothing all day.
330
Life is too short.
See that play.
Eat that dessert.
Take that road trip.
Sell your soul.
Serve me for eternity.
Adopt that puppy.
331
Give me a date then smh imma busy devil twitter.com/real_mercyeke/…
332
Can one of you stop at Wendy’s for me before you die.
333
Come down to hell, the only place where you can make unlimited roasted marshmallows for eternity
334
There's a special place in Hell for people who don't wash their hands after using the bathroom
335
Wake the fuck up dumbass it’s time to sin
337
if you ever need to roast some marshmallows feel free to visit us.
338
I spoke to God and neither of us want the homophobes.
339
Wake up sinners, you’re all going to hell so enjoy your life while you can.
340
Come to Hell, the ice cream machine in McDonald’s is never broken.
342
Unvaccinated kids are not accepted into hell.
343
Please don’t drink & drive there’s enough morons down here.
344
Wake up bitches you better have a good day 👿
345
Because none of them exist twitter.com/funshographix/…
347
I tried this and I got arrested. Thanks a lot. twitter.com/ColIegeStudent…
348
Stop asking Jesus to grab the wheel.
He can’t drive.
349
Wake up sinners, Monday’s don’t suck it’s your life that Does.
350
Stop saying I’m responsible for gun girl it’s insulting.
Not evil just misunderstood