251
Maison just said, “can we get a pet bat?” I said, “no.” She said, “if you get me a pet bat, I promise I won’t throw another tantrum from now till when I go to college.” I said, “Okay, I’ll look into a pet bat.”
252
I see lots of comments about how tone-deaf my video is. I agree and I feel sick. I want to delete it, but I think that will erase all of your important comments & I feel like I should own my ignorance. I've been wrestling with this all night & day. Don't know what to do. Sorry.
253
I was going to wait 'til @EW sent me a free copy, but the guy at the news stand said, “If you lick it, you buy it...”
254
Have you ever seen someone perform such a delicate task with such fierce tension on their face?
255
Happy #StPatricksDay! In honor of the holiday, I’m wearing green & making plans to drive all the snakes out of Washington. Who’s with me?
256
@jarpad You know what’s amazing? I seem to have misspelled your name so many times that my phone autocompleted it to the wrong spelling.
257
Way to go, @jarpad! I’m cheering you on from the comfort of my couch. (If you finish under 3 hours & 30 minutes, I’ll pay for half of your first hip replacement.) twitter.com/GenPadalecki/s…
258
I hope your V-Day was filled with frosting & sweetness. #HappyValentinesDay
259
Sorry for that offensive tweet re: shipping. I need need to be more thoughtful. I used a term that I had never really given any thought to other than, "that's a thing?! Yuck." But it's not a thing to be made light of. Sorry.
260
My dear friend has had a fever, cough & headache for days, but is being told he can’t get tested unless he’s a first responder or in critical condition. Under-testing is keeping official infection numbers in the US at a fraction of the truth. Trump wants to keep the tally low.
261
Your friendly reminder to remember to stop and smell the butterflies.
262
This is a billboard in Michigan. I don’t know how it happened, but I love it.
263
Maison saved a seed from eating a pickle last night. She pondered, “will it grow cucumbers or pickles?” Then announced, “there’s only one way to find out! Let’s plant it!” Then she ran out to the garden.
264
I don’t remember what was happening here, and that’s probably for the best. Happy bday, @RobBenedict. Thanks for letting me invade your personal space.
265
I did a zoom workout with Maison in the basement this morning. She held a plank longer than I did. Impressed, I said, "Maison, I've never seen you work so hard!" She said, "Yeah. I need to get strong so I can hurt West." #ProudDad
266
Important PSA:
If you're white, shoot whomever you want and the US judicial system will have your back. Happy hunting!
267
We're turning to the ultimate arbiter of paternity issues, @LaurenLLake, to determine once & for all whether I actually fathered my son, @Alex8Calvert. Don't worry, Alex, we'll get to the bottom of this!
@PaternityCourt @GISH
269
See how effortless I made holding my brother look?
271
Maison just said, “people always say mermaids are so beautiful; with their long flowing hair, and their clam-shell bras... but really they probably have sea worms in their hair and they wearing nothing and they’re 1/2 fish! If you think about it, mermaids are kind of disgusting.”
272
I was so proud of my fathering skills for thinking to bring a tiny travel-sized maple syrup and paper cups to the ski slope today to make snow cones.
When I presented the winter treat, Maison said, “Dad, this smells weird.”
The moral of the story: Read the fine print.
274
She outgrew her little boots. Makes me sad.
275
I gave myself a shelter-in-place haircut and thought it looked pretty good, but Maison informed me that the back of my head had not been a success. Maison tried to repair with scissors. She reported, "I cut off the weird tail thing, but you still look sick."
Actor, baker, candlestick maker
Cell: (323)405-9939
he/him