351
me, very gay, playing dungeons & dragons for the first time:
352
a father playing with his fun child while the other child who hates fun watches:
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You like your eggs over well with a hard yolk. Don't pretend to know how Asian Americans think.
354
still doing this tho twitter.com/EugeneLeeYang/…
355
mom: hello how have you bee-
me: if anything happens to Arya over the next six weEKS I WILL BURN EVERYTHING TO THE GROUND I SWEAR TO GOD #GameofThrones
357
Pastry Chef Attempts to Make Snack Into Culinary Treasure In 3 Days While Stressed And Is Pushed To Exhaustion But Faces Failure With Determination Before Winning My Heart With Her Relatable Need To Overachieve Her Way Out Of Her Existential Dread | Gourmet Makes | @bonappetit
358
threw a puppet-themed birthday party twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
359
I would very much like to petition that everyone get paid time off between Tuesday and January 4th, 2021.
360
Dear Friends,
You know me.
It's #October1st.
You can have every other month.
You can keep all the other holidays.
But now is my time to shine.
Sincerely,
Your Friend Who Hates Everything Else
🎃👻🍁🧟♂️🦇😈🍂🧛♂️💀
362
Pulling off a blunt bob is pure, absolute POWER.
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I went on to explain how queer sex dynamics are unique and said, "imagine how it'd be different if you were with a woman."
She scoffs, "NO, never," and when I prodded her further sHE GOES...
"Well if I was lesbian then I would probably just hold hands and GARDEN or something."
364
Happy Holidays to all the pets who want to murder their owners and bury our bodies right now
367
I've regained access to my account - thank y'all so much for alerting me about the hack! Obviously, please disregard the scam tweet that was posted yesterday. Spaces before punctuation marks? I would NEVER.
Just so y'all know it's me, I've also included a stunning pic of Kimbop.
368
doctor - “it’s a girl!”
Asian parents - *look into baby’s eyes*
“Jennifer.”
369
...and then there were two married Try Guys. 👰🏻🎊💍
#beith #tohabandtohold #beckywiththegoodkeith
@KeithHabs @nedfulmer @korndiddy
370
I feel emboldened by this breakthrough conversation and was like, fuck it, might as well explain what bears and otters and twinks are, and she asks, "so gay men are like animals?"
I respond, "some gay types, yeah," and she hAS THE NERVE TO SAY...
"So...what are you, a pony?"
371
the energy of a #bts show is incomparable 🔥
372
them: sit down, stop being so extra
me:
373
I can't stress enough how backwards and damaging it is to exclude stories from top award honors because of English language requirements. It's archaic and centers English as the standard to determine a film's "foreignness." This echoes beyond entertainment. It's a cultural issue.
374
How the hell can anyone behave like that in a grocery store? Every time I have to get eggs it's like I'm going to Disneyland, I'm so goddamn grateful. I'd wear a hundred masks for the opportunity to stare at vegetables around strangers.
375
Friendly reminder that Lucy Liu is incredible and talented and gorgeous and important.
