1726
i've been on criminal minds longer than that kid was in that cool linklater movie where they filmed him once a year until he had a mustache
1727
...and i still can't grow a mustache
1728
swim badge? check. first aid badge? check. human pineapple on his way to a mighty mighty bosstones concert? CHECK
1729
i look like draco malfoy if he was the regional manager of a sports authority
1730
crayon drawing of my mom on a napkin!
1731
@drakedoremus @benyorkjones @Cirque we feel most at home when surrounded by highly flexible ninja clowns. cirque forever!
1732
not trying to brag but i do hot yoga with mr. bean, mr. burns, and that green dude from lord of the rings
1733
shout out to my occasional morbid depression!
1734
thought I caught a rare pokemon on my neighbor's hammock but it turned out to be his sunburned nephew. anyone know a good lawyer?
1735
moms love downton abbey, dads love downtown arby's
1737
"hey pinocchio! where are you going?"
1739
broccolini is just broccoli that went to cotillion
1740
i just accidentally brushed my teeth with neosporin
1741
sloth with a new haircut and a macdonald's necklace
1742
#gublertattootuesday of a drawing i did of a girl dressed like minnie mouse
1743
#flashbackfriday to getting machete chopped on the belafonte
1744
#gublertattootuesday of a mermoth i once met in an old nevada ghost town
1745
my alter ego (smirky von noodlehair) takes 47 selfies a day and only drinks luke warm smoothies
1746
directing my 10th episode of criminal minds. it's called "elliot's pond" and it's going to spook your socks off
1747
"elliot's pond" house that i just basically designed to look like my dream house
1749
on the first day of fall i like to deliver pumpkins to friend's doorsteps late at night while dressed like this
1750
usually i say nothing, just hand the pumpkin & leave, but sometimes i come in to play pinball & eat all your snacks
really good at decorating for holidays